It Takes Two to Tango

To you, it may seem as though it has been a long time since my last blog. In truth, it is. But to me, it has been an age.


I have been through so much, I need to put it into two blogs. It's a bit like a television programme that gets your attention with a dramatic two-part series starter, before settling back in to regular programmes.
I'm sorry I can't be more regular, but you can't really rush  life.


I am going to dedicate this blog to getting partially over somebody. I went through hell to get there, but I did it and I feel much better because of it. I'm safer, legally, also.


So I liked my teacher. Quite a lot. To the point I may just have loved them. My heart fluttered every time I saw them and I felt as though my life revolved around him. In a sense, it did. Every time I saw him I forgot what I was doing and had to watch him. I thought we would be good together and I should try and be flirty (the flirty I know which basically means go red and avoid eye-contact when he looks at me) around him.


That was what part of me said I should do. The part of me that is like a miniature Agony Aunt told me that it was ridiculous. He could have a girlfriend. He could be married! He could have a child!
It was insane and the only trouble was that my heart refused to give him up.


He was (and still is) pretty good-looking. He was my ideal man in looks. I've always been a sucker for the guy that is too old for me, and there was one just... there...
It probably didn't help he was the only one of two male teachers I had at the time. The other one was also good-looking, but not the type that 'appeals' to me.
I think you need male teachers in your life. This has taught me- not what I was supposed to learn, it is true, but taught me nonetheless- that you will meet someone that you simply cannot have. You can love them until the cows come home, but just no. I learnt that the storm will pass, but you will have to go through the storm first. And, to be honest, this is one of those lessons I will actually use in later life.


The process of 'getting over' him is one of the most difficult things I have ever done. It's not as though I can simply avoid him. If he handy already of guessed he would have done by that time. One day I was blushing and almost gawping whenever I saw him, the next I was looking down or trying too hard to stage a conversation with whoever I was walking with.
It took time. Months even. Almost half a year. But I am so close to being over him. He had only rejected my heart, and all I had to do was find it again. And that I did. I found it with another person. And so the whole process began again. Great.


All I feel when I see Mr Perfect is a distant feeling of longing. I will never fully be over him whilst I see him this often. I still imagine that we could be together, but now it is only when I see him. I can sleep without lying there thinking about what a mess my life is. At least, when he's a part of it. Or not, depending on your angle.
In case you haven't guessed, there is now someone else in my life. It's taken me so long to get round to writing this that I have also had other person join the rather awkward party.


I will update you with the events of this seemingly never-ending party as soon as I can.
Thank you for your patience!